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16 Months of Memories
Jules, We have been back from the mountains for over a week now. I missed having you with us again. What I did have were memories of you being there in all the years past, and I wish I could tell all...
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November Gardening
Holding my daughter in my heart is not an easy task. The problem isn’t that I can’t or don’t hold her in my heart, because I’ve always held her in my heart. The problem is that I don’t want her only in...
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Getting Ready for Thanksgiving
2014 November 23 Hi Hon, I had a meltdown in the store today. Your dad and I were shopping for Thanksgiving food and as we began the check out, I thought of how excited we were that we were going to...
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The Day After
2014 December 26 On Christmas Eve, we missed you. We cried knowing you were not ever going to be with us. On Christmas morning I missed knowing what you wanted for Christmas. Missed checking your...
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Done yet?
Julia, Here it is a week before the 2nd anniversary of when you left your body behind here on planet earth. I like to think of you. The memories come back and you are again with me. I like to remember...
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We were strangers in the land of Egypt
(Written on Easter morning, April 5, 2015) Everything now is seen through the lens of grief. I feel like a stranger in this world now except for when I am with those who have also had their son or...
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Your Birthday
A short message because I want to say something about your birthday. It’s the third one without you. It seems so long ago that we were together and in other ways it was just the other day. I received...
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Lillies in July
Julia, I think of you every day. I miss you terribly and there is no way to even try to describe the void that your absence has created in my life and heart. Two weeks ago the lilies that you gave me...
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Thanksgiving 2015
“Grief turns out to be a place none of us know until we reach it. We anticipate (we know) that someone close to us could die, but we do not look beyond the few days or weeks that immediately follow...
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What They Don’t Ask About
Here I am at another holiday season and someone actually gave me a kind word by saying it must be hard this time of year because of Julia; about how Julia would not be coming home for the holidays and...
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